Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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