It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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