scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
