i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
wakey wakey hands off snakey
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
this must be what syphilis tastes like
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
