did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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