I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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