Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
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