Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Randomize
