All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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