We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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