I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
