So drunk its hurt
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
