i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
