Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
