just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
