my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
