he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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