if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i want to swaddle you in tequila
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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