how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Everyone says I win the strip club
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Randomize
