Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
