I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
last night I used snow as a chaser
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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