So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
