Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I still have a little drunk in my system
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
