There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize