I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
