some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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