oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
