I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Drunk is not a location!
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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