found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
