I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I wish you could order shots online.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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