so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
