Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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