im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
