My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
