I need help removing her.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
i think my cat just said my name.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
