oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
