operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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