i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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