Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
i out mim tonsoeep
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