got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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