her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
home. puking in laundry basket.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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