How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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