Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
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