How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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