If that was your dad, he is hot
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
you are never too drunk for berry picking
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Randomize
