one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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