The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Randomize
