so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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