Kiss
Puke
It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
