yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
